帮忙看一下有没有语法错误，谢谢！

【Is everything goes smoothly?】改成Is everything all right? 或者Does everything go well? 用smoothly 个人感觉有点chinglish。
【The CD was last month which I borrow from you.】 像这种复杂的句子明显你还掌控不了，不如就用简单点的句子，不会错。改成：I borrowed it from you last month.

【I am sorry to forget to return to you.】I am sorry that I forget to return it (to you). 这里return少了宾语。
【I wonder if it is convince for you to tell your address to me.】I wonder if it is convenient for you to tell me your address.

【Express Mail Services】其实，这里直接写EMS大家也看得懂的。。。当然你如果是为了凑字数也无妨。。。
【I will go to Canada on next Sunday】I will go to Canada next Sunday.

【Two ways above are providing you to choose. Please tell me you choose and accept my sincere apologies. I am looking forward to your early replay.】虽然我懂你说的什么意思，但是“你有两条路可选，”这个口气有点像小日本逼供革命党人，你有两条路可选，要么~要么~。。。
I wonder if it is convenient for you to tell me your address because I want to send you this CD by Express Mail Services as soon as possible. By the way, I will go to Canada next Sunday, so I can bring this CD to you by myself, too. To mail it or to bring it by myself, which would you like?

Please tell me you choice and accept my sincere apology. I am looking forward to your early reply.

Is everything going well?
yesterday后面的逗号去掉。
when I was looking for my notebook 根据上下文，你应该是寻找笔记本的时候吧
The CD was the one that I borrowed from you last month.
I am sorry that I have forgotten to return it to you.
Is it convenient for you to tell me your address please? 不要太罗嗦
I will send it to you by Express Mail as soon as possible.
next Sunday前面的on去掉
so I can give it to you by myself 重复说this CD显得啰嗦
Which way do you prefer?Please let me know and accept my sincere apology.

本来看到很多人回答不想发过来的，但是觉得楼上的回答还不够全面。希望对你有帮助。

“I wonder if it is convince for you to tell your address to me”，应为"convenient",除了词性不对外，拼写也有误； "I will go to Canada on next Sunday",去掉介词on; "Two ways above are providing you to choose.",建议改为"two days are provided for you to choose"; "Please tell me you choose "应为"please tell me your choice".

错误比较多啊 多斟酌一下吧 可惜我英语作文不太好，语法错误较多，另外表达比较中文化

把作文里面要求的要点写出来应该有人可以帮你

Does everything go smoothly?I came back from Canada last week. Yesterday,when I was looking at my notebook, I found a music CD in my luggage.The CD was borrowed from you last month. I am sorry to forget to return to you.
I wonder if it is convince for you to tell your address to me. I will send this CD by Express Mail Services to you as soon as possible. By the way, I will go to Canada next Sunday, so I can take this CD to you by myself.
Two ways above are provided for you to choose. Please tell me your choose and accept my sincere apologies. I am looking forward to your early replay.
Yours sincerely
Li Ming