求高手帮我修改这篇英语作文（CET4） 顺便打一下分数

Recreational activities
The past decade has witnessed a huge development in economy owing to the reform and opening-up policy being(去掉being) carried out, recreational activities are becoming increasingly.
The benefits of recreational activities are obvious, because it (改为they)help us to expanding（改为expand） vision and add colors to our lives. However, everything can be divided into two. (前一句改为every coin has two sides)The negative aspects are also apparent. Excessive entertainment will waste a lot of valuable time.
As a colleague student, I harbor the idea.(加上Whether) entertainment activities are productive or harmful depend（改为depends） on our own attitude(改为attitudes). Suitable recreational activities could (改为can)enrich our campus life. But excessive entertainment activities will affect out study. Therefore, we should reasonable(改为reasonably) control the time of recreational activities and enjoy it.改完后最少能得百分之七八十分数

81分评语： 作者学术词汇使用比较准确，词汇表达较丰富，但仍需增加词汇积累；若加强一些复杂句和从句的使用，文章会更棒；上下文衔接不流畅，文章结构不严谨；请注意分段。

　　Rapid development in economy has been witnessed for the decades owing to the reforming and opening-up policy being carried out and recreational activities are becoming so popular that you can take part in everywhere.
　　The benefits of recreational activities are remarkable that they help us to expand vision and add colors to our lives. However, everything may have two sides. The negative aspects are also apparent. Excessive entertainment will waste a lot of valuable time.
　　In my opinion, as a college student, entertainment activities are productive or harmful depending on our own attitude. Appropriate recreational activities can enrich our campus life but excessive entertainment activities will cause bad effects to our study. Therefore, we should reasonably control the time of recreational activities whilen enjoying it.