英语作文修改,英语高手进!

恩。。 第一句的介词，用about不合适，对于一段时间的话，用during，in 似乎要好一点。 第二句，句子顺序不好，因为提前的是重点，我觉得重要的不是为了完成作业，而应该是你节约了时间。而游戏时间用gaming time会好的多。
第三句，sentence fragment，去掉so。至于in a row我不知道这样好不好，不过我比较喜欢i got up early everyday for the whole week.
第四句，恩。。不知道你要表达的意思是不是你作业做累了，就帮妈妈做家务。。 。。 如果是的话，就改成I helped my mother with some housework, when i was tired to continue homework.
第5句。改成，so i could get physical exercise besides（other then） mental practice.
第6句。i planed and separated my work into pieces. Then i could finish one for each day.
7句：It was bored, but at least i done(finished) my homework.
最后：Time flies. The spring festival is over. I get some lucky money(red pockets) from relatives and friends. I really enjoyed my winter.

我没有做大的修改，不过我觉得文章的构思上还有不少问题。。比如说既然写寒假，在那么短的作文里面，不如不提春节。 或者只写春节。

恩。。 不知道你是几年级的学生了。。单词用的不难。。应该没问题吧。。

my winter holiday
Nothing is different on my winter vacation. In order to finish assignment, I reduced my game-playing time and I got up early for a week in a row. I felt tired and come up with ideas giving hands to mother. This made me relaxed.I usually do some similar things every day. It was boring. I thought. But I could not find anything interesting or worthwile to do.
How time flies! I enjoyed my Spring Festival. Sure, I have gotten some allowance money and visit some relatives and friends.

My winter vacation
Nothing is different about my winter vacation. In order to finish homework, I saved my play-time. so I got up early everyday for a week. I felt tired and started helping my mother. It made me relaxed. I usually do something in different days. I will be bored, I thought. But I could not find anything interesting. (一个句子不可有两个动词 couldnot/is)
How time flies! I enjoyed my Spring Festival. Sure, I have gotten some lucky money and visit friends and relatives.__(亲朋好友)____

My winter vacation
Nothing is different about my winter vacation. In order to finish my homework, I saved my leisure-time. so I got up early everyday for a week. I felt tired and started helping my mother. It made me relaxed. I usually do something in different days. I will be bored, I thought. But I could not find anything interesting.
How time flies! I enjoyed my Spring Festival. Sure, I have gotten some lucky money and visit my friends and relatives. But it is not the way i likt to spend the winter vacation.I wish there are something different or more interesting happen on my vacation.

relatives and friends