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A Daughter’s Search, A Mother’s Dream

The message Diane Sanchez heard on her answering machine at 5:30 p.m. on November 30, 1988, Created terror, guilt and anguish, and revived a seemingly impossible dream. It said simply: “ I am calling concerning an event that occurred on September 2, 1968. Please call Gloria Porter.” There was a Massachusetts telephone number. Overwhelmed by warring emotions , Diane lay down on her bed and wept.
At age 41, Diane Sanchez enjoyed an enviable life. She was president of a San Francisco-area consulting firm. She was secure in the live of a devoted husband, a 13-year-old son and five stepchildren. She had an elegant home and plenty of money.
But there was a secret void in her life. It arose from “ an event that occurred on September 2, 1968.”
Trembling, Diane dialed Gloria Porter’s number. It was 9 p.m. on the U.S. East Coast, and there was no answer. Calling without success throughout the night, she relived events she had long to forget.

Diane grew up on Florida dairy farms. Her childhood was idyllic until her mid-teens, when divorce broke up the family. After high school she struck out on her own, working as a copy girl for a Fort Lauderdale, Florida, newspaper. Promoted to feature writer when she was 20, she became infatuated with a journalist six years her senior.
Diane knew little about sex and birth control. By the time she discovered that she was pregnant, her relationship with the journalist had ended. Estranged from both parents and without any close friends, she was alone. Nonetheless, she resolved to give birth and then to do all she could to place the baby what a couple who could provide the love and security she herself had known as a child. Yet she could not face the disgrace of unwed motherhood in Fort Lauderdale, where newspaper work had make her well-known.
In desperation Diane confided her plight to an acquaintance. “ I have a girlfriend who works for the Red Cross in Boston,” he said. “She’ll take you in.” That same month, June 1968, 23-year-old Sandy Baker welcomed Diane into her apartment and steered her to a part-time job.
On September 2, Diane gave birth to a daughter. Against strong advice, she insisted on seeing her baby. She studied the perfectly formed, healthy infant for about ten minutes before nurses gently took her away. Diane wept silently. My baby is gone forever.
Three weeks later, Diane took a trolley to the New England Home for Little Wanderers in Boston. Seated at a desk in a dimly lit room, she stared at a document that transferred all legal rights to her baby to the private adoption agency. It also obligated her never to attempt to see the child or gather information about her. Diane needed nearly an hour to sign.
Starting over Boston, she became successful selling speed-reading courses to executives. In 1971 she married Stephen Herman, then 36 and a vice president of North American Van Lines. They move to California in 1978, where Steve worked for and became a partner in a company that taught sales techniques to personnel of major corporations. Like their marriage, the business flourished, and by 1989 Steve had retired and Diane was in charge.
Diane never told her husband about the baby. But she kept her maiden name, trying to leave a trail her daughter might someday follow. She often wondered what kind of home she had, with what kind of parents.
Deep Yearning. No child could have had a better home than the one John and Joyce Fallon Provided the baby, whom they named Kelly. A former military policeman, detective and insurance investigator, John managed his own parking business. Joyce devoted herself to family and church, where she taught Sunday school and sang in the choir. Unable to have children, the Fallons cherished Kelly and their two sons, who also had come to them from the Home for Little Wanderers.
The Fallons told Kelly she had been adopted and frankly answered all her questions. Once at supper when Kelly was six or seven, she asked, “ Who was my mother?”
“ We don’t know her name,” Joyce answered. “ We only know that when you were born, she could not give you a good home. She loved you so much that she arranged to have you adopted.”
“ Someday I’ll thank her,” Kelly said.
Given affection, attention and discipline, Kelly grew into a lovely young woman with deep blue eyes and auburn hair. An honor student in school, she had a host of friends and revered Joyce and John as mother and father.
Kelly’s deeply rooted yearning to discover more about her origins manifested itself in 1986 during her first year at the University of New Hampshire. She even wrote a term paper on the pros and cons of adopted children attempting to find their natural mothers.
The Fallons assured Kelly of their support, and in August 1988 she petitioned the court for permission to examine her adoption records. The court granted her request, and the Fallons drove her to the Home for Little Wanderers. Just as Diane had done 20 years earlier, Kelly sat alone in a small room and opened a thick file labeled “ Baby Girl Sanchez.”
Each revelation about her natural mother excited Kelly. Then she realized she was now almost the same age her mother had been when she was born, and she wondered what she would have done in her mother’s circumstances.
Initial Contact. While the records detailed Diane’s background, they offered no hint of her present whereabouts. Boston and Florida telephone directories were no help. And a social worker who had aided Diane before she gave birth in 1968 said she did not remember her.
Two months after Kelly returned to college in the fall of 1988, John Fallon engaged a lawyer to assist the family’s search. The adoption records identified Diane’s father as a graduate the University of Florida, and the lawyer eventually located him through the school’s alumni association. When the lawyer called and said an old friend in Boston wanted to get in touch with Diane, her father provided the California phone number.
Just as the law barred Diane from trying to contact her child, it forbade Kelly from communicating directly with her mother. The court had to inform Diane that Kelly wanted to talk to her. If Diane rejected the overture, Kelly could take no further action.
On Friday November 25, 1988, court officer Gloria Porter left a message on Diane’s answering machine. Trying to be discreet, she said only, “ Diane Sanchez, call Gloria Porter.” And left the court’s number in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Porter’s name meant nothing to Diane, and she ignored the call.
Kelly stayed by the phone all weekend, hoping each time it rang to hear her mother’s voice. On Monday she returned to college, convinced that Diane did not want to see her and never had. John Dillon saw the hurt in Kelly’s eyes and tried to console her.
When Tuesday passed without a word, John insisted the court call Diane again. This time, Gloria Porter mentioned the date of Kelly’s birth, leaving no doubt what the message was about.
At 6 a.m. California time on December1, Diane finally reached Porter. The court officer said, “ You have a daughter who was adopted. Her name is Kelly Fallon. She wants to meet you, and her parents approve. Do you want to speak with her?”
“ Yes! Yes!” Diane replied exultantly. “ Where can I call her?”
“ She is away at college. But I can give you Mr. Fallon’s office and home numbers.”
Giving Thanks. Diane took an hour to compose herself and rehearse what she would say. But when John answered the phone, she stammered, “ I am Diane Sanchez … Diane Heiman … Twenty years ago I had a baby and let her be adopted … .”
John immediately put her at ease. “ Thank you for calling. Thank you for Kelly.”
As they eagerly traded information, Diane realized she was talking to a strong and considerate man, a good father. Then Joyce took the phone and said, “ I’ve thanked you every day for 20 years for letting us have Kelly.”
John reached Kelly that evening at 6 p.m. “ We’ve found her!” he announced.
“ Does she want to see me?” Kelly asked.
“ Very much,” John assured her.
A few hours later, Kelly telephoned Diane. Awkward pauses and nervous laughter interrupted their conversation, but both were live rated from longstanding fears.
Diane thought, She doesn’t hate me for giving her up.
Kelly realized, She’s a real person, and she wants to meet me.
When Diane’s husband returned from a trip, she told hem the story for the first time. Steve’s first reaction was to ask, “ So what else haven’t you told me?” Soon though, he drew her into his arms and said, “ Until today I had six children. Now I have seven.”
Diane and Kelly agreed to meet after Christmas in San Francisco and then to vacation in Hawaii.
On December 30, attired in a royal-blue suit, Diane waited alone at San Francisco airport. Kelly bounded from the plane into her arms. Fighting back tears, Diane studied the pretty young woman just as she had looked at the tiny infant 20 years before. All these years I was without my baby, she thought. Another woman raised her and loved her. Another woman is her mother. But maybe we can be friends.
Hardest Question. The next day, Diane, Kelly and Steve flew to Maui and stayed in a hotel overlooking a magnificent beach. During the first days Diane and Kelly remained tense. Having lost each other once, they feared losing one another again.
Then, on the fifth day, they decided to take a drive. When they stopped to photograph a beautiful sunset, the tropical sky suddenly howled so powerfully they could not move against it back to the car. Instinctively they clutched each other for protection. Then the moment passed, and they laughed as the downpour ruined their just coifed hair. The warmth of that spontaneous embrace had melted the barrier between them.
In the next days Kelly questioned Diane closely about her background, then about the pregnancy that resulted in her own birth. She saved the hardest question for last.
When she was a child, the word abortion had first puzzled and then terrified Kelly. But she had to know. “ Did you ever think of having an abortion?”
“ I think every woman should have a choice,” Diane replied. “ I did not. In those days, it was illegal.”
“ But, if you could have, would you have?”
“ No,” Diane said.
Kelly was silent for a while. Then she said, “ Thank you.”

Back in California, Diane telephoned Joyce Fallon to say that she and Kelly were developing a close relationship akin to that of sisters. But, Diane emphasized, she would never do anything to come between Kelly and Joyce.
“ Don’t worry,” Joyce assured her. “ There is enough love to go around.”
呵呵 应该是你要的吧 ?

好像是《心灵鸡汤》里面的