急急急！！！！帮忙改篇英语作文谢谢，明天晚上之前要。谢谢！

opportunity 前面加the
them 改为 whcih,非限制性定语从句。
therefore 后面加“，”
in campus 改为 on campus
absenting 改为being absent from
you will 改为 will you, Only 在句首，用倒装
if you want, want 后面加to
you are in college， you后面加are

文章写得不错，观点阐述明确，逻辑连贯。

Nowadays more and more students have the opportunity to go to university; many of them look forward to having a relaxing college life. Therefore it is common to see a lazy student be late for classes, leave early even not attend classes on campus.
It is necessary to improve the attendance rate. As we all know college is a place where you can not only learn much more knowledge, but also realize how to survive the competitive society. If you learned nothing in the college, you would take a heavy toll in the future. At the same time the attendance rate also plays a vital role in collefe education.
As a college student we must ensure that we attendthe classes. On the other hand, we should help others keep out of being absent from classes. Only in this way will you not regret what you have done when you graduate from university.
In a word, if you want to have a wonderful future, you should pay more attention when you are in college.

Nowadays more and more students have opportunities to go to university. Many of them look forward to having a relaxing college life. Therefore, it is common to see a lazy student late for class ,leave earlier and even don’t attend the class on campus.
It is necessary to improve the attendance rate. As we all know ,college is a place where you can not only learn much more knowledge, but also realize how to survive the competitive society. If you learned nothing in the college, you would take a heavy toll in the future. At the same time the attendance rate also plays a vital role in education.
As a college student we must ensure that we attend the classes. On the other hand, we should help others keep out of absenting themselves from the classes. Only in this way will you not regret what you have done when you graduate from university.
In a word, if you want to have a wonderful future, you should pay more attention when you are in college.