希望得到英语高手的帮助啊 帮我修改一下错误

总体看来，一致性在英语写作中很重要的。简单来说就是主语保持一致，像LZ您写的有些句子用物体做主语，有些又用“I”，看起来就缺乏逻辑上的一致。不过整体改动的话又很麻烦，所以我就稍作一些小修改吧，希望别介意：）

1. 别用firstly了你后面不是用secondly连接，干脆改成To start with
2. the space of house is much larger than THAT OF the building
3. I like THE LARGER space (space空间，不可数的不能用a）
4. THEN, the house environment....（用了“开始”了没有“接下来”怎么行？）
5. 如LS说的 the house is more peaceful
6. 整句这样表达的话一致性会好些：As the house is more peaceful, there is no need to worry about the noise from the upstairs or downstairs.
7. 最后一句在第二分句前面加上连词so，否则变成双谓语了噢！

1. FIRSTLY, the apartment has many good facilities, WHICH could...(变成定语从句更pro）
2. 然后呢，如LS说的一样such as引导的举例在最后的两个东西之间要用and。
3. Secondly, if I (choose to) live in ..., when I get home from work, I could release stress by looking up to the sky on my balcony.（其实感觉有点怪怪的，不过要调整成这样才稍微条理一些）
4. 最后一点不如这样写吧，否则全部都the apartment the apartment的很累赘。Thirdly, the security of apartment is more guaranteed, for it not only has the CCTV, but also.....

你看下这样怎么样咯 最后的建议就是以后写作的时候 尽量少用重复的词 否则不但没有新意还会觉得很拗口 看起来容易引起疲劳 所以多用句式和同义词的转换：）

prefer to living
is more peaceful
and those facilities could bring
such as parking, elevators, convenience and