比较多，先看一段，an English song affection is rich,beautiful rhyme, pleasant。 song 和affection二者究竟哪个 is rich？二个连用不通，beautiful rhyme, pleasant，结构不平行，不能同时共用前面动词is。
make the listener to create a relaxed atmosphere--------- make改成·enable才可接后面的to do， relaxed atmosphere也是逻辑不通的中式英语错误，正确说法是 relaxing atmosphere。that the listener can't help the humming along, completely attracted not feel nervous or shy, can be overcome by one's feelings will love lyric in spoken English这句简直看不懂，该做文建议重写
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