2分钟简单的英语小笑话

1. A little boy asked his father: Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?The father replied: I don 't know son. I 'm still paying!!一个小男孩问他的爸爸，结婚要花多少钱？爸爸说：我不知道，因为我仍然在付帐.

2. A Sunday school teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making others glad. "Now, children," said she , "has anyone of you ever make someone else glad?"

"Please, teacher,"said a small boy,"I've make someone glad yesterday."

"Well done. Who was that?"

"My granny."

"Good boy. Now tell us how you made your grandmother glad."

"Please, teacher, I went to see her yesterday, and stayed with her three hours. Then I said to her, 'Granny, I'm going home,' and she said, 'Well, I'm glad'!"

一个主日学校校(基督教教会为了向儿童灌输宗教思想, 在星期天开办的儿童班)的老师在对学生讲使别人高兴的重要性。“现在，孩子们，”她说：“你们当中有谁让别人高兴过？”

“我，老师，”一个小男孩说：“昨天我就使别人高兴过。”

“做得好，是谁呢？”

“我奶奶。”

“好孩子。现在告诉我们，你是怎样使你奶奶高兴的。”

“是这样的，老师。我昨天去看她，在她那儿呆了三个小时。然后我跟她说：‘奶奶，我要回家了。’她说：‘啊，我很高兴！

3.Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.

The children played for an hour, and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen. She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him, "Now here's a knife, Dick. Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister, but remember to do it like a gentleman."

"Like a gentleman?" Dick asked. "How do gentlemen do it?"

"They always give the bigger piece to the other person." answered his aunt at once.

"Oh" said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,"Cut this cake in half, Catherine.".

迪克年龄七岁，他的妹妹凯瑟琳五岁。一天，妈妈把他们带到姨妈家去玩，自己就到大城市去买些新的衣服。

孩子们玩了个把小时，在四点半的时候，姨妈领着迪克走进了厨房。她交给迪克一块精美的蛋糕和一把刀子，并对他说：“喏，迪克，给你刀子，把这块蛋糕一切为二，给你妹妹一块。不过，你得记住要做得像一个绅士那样。”
迪克问：“像一个绅士？绅士怎样做呢？”

他姨妈马上回答说：“绅士总是把大的一块让给别人的。”

迪克说了一声“噢”。他对此想了一会，然后，他把蛋糕拿给妹妹，并对她说：“凯瑟琳，你来把这块蛋糕一切为二吧。”

明上英文课时跟老师说：May I go to the toilet? 老师说：Go ahead. 小明就坐了下来。过了一会儿，小明又跟老师说： 　　 　　　　May I go to the toilet? 老师说：Go ahead. 小明又坐了下来。他旁边的同学于是忍不住问：你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗？怎么不去？ 　　 　　　　小明说：你没听老师说“去你个头”啊！ 　　 　　 　　-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 　　 　　　　一对热恋中的男女。女生非常没有安全感，于是对着男友说：“SAY I LOVE YOU!! SAY IT! SAY IT! SAY IT!” 　　 　　　　男的答道：“IT!” 　　 　　 　　-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 　　 　　　　一位在美的留学生，想要考国际驾照。在考试时因为过于紧张，看到地上标线是向左转。 　　 　　　　他不放心的问道:turn left？ 　　 　　　　监考官回答：right。于是他立刻向右转…… 　　 　　 　　-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 　　 　　　　某人刻苦学习英语，终有小成。一日上街不慎与一老外相撞，忙说：I am sorry。 　　 　　　　老外应道：I am sorry too。 　　 　　　　某人听后又道：I am sorry three。 　　 　　　　老外不解，问：What are you sorry for? 某人无奈，道：I am sorry five。 　　

　Does the dog know the proverb,　too?

　　　 The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.

　　　 "It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"

　　　 "Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"

　　 狗也知道这个谚语吗？

　　　 一个小男孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。

　　　“没有关系，”一位先生说，“不用害怕，你知道这条谚语吗：‘吠狗不咬人。’”

　　　“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道吗？”

用ABCDEFG造句，
回答的是：A呀，这小B是C家的，站在地上，EF也不穿，